Scott The Great

Broken Pieces

2011-10-26T14:41:00.003+08:00

It has been too long... dam dam dam too long.... I came back due to inspiration. A few days ago, I saw someones blog and to my surprise she's awesome. But of course not as awesome as Eexin. She is still by far the best blogger I've seen. Anyways, I have been through a lot since I blog. So much as happen and I mean MUCH. Currently using fren's broadband to online (hope he dun mind much). So it is on to surfing for latest hot tracks for my ears. Argh to hell with tat..... I miss "her". yes it is her... the 4th..... she was indeed a magnificent gal and she probably still is... it's been a long time since we stay in touched and I wish i could go back in time and just say out what needs to be said. A lot of things are kept bottle up in my heart and lately the bottle is getting full. I feel tat when it comes to the opposite sex, I am utterly useless. Aside from tat, there is a basketball competition coming up and I feel that I will greatly let my team down. There is a saying in a blog that I read,

Single people mostly party a lot live alone most times

it is true that I am a lot alone at most times. Yeah I have many friends and etc but no matter how many relationships I build, it just seems tat I am still alone. there is another saying i once saw somewhere saying that,

" If a person always make a group or other people happy, that person is the most lonely person."

This is indeed another true fact about myself..... I hate being alone. It makes me feel unwanted or not important. Everyday, I fake a smile to get by and no one saw it was a lie or a cover up. They just think I am that way and just move on with their lives. There is a lot of pain and scars on me that is extremely unbearable. Perhaps it is myself that is the problem. but one way or another, nobody cares.

Pain

2011-05-10T07:42:00.002+08:00

i've been away for awhile and i am sorry for tat. but the past few days, i have been carrying a burden of pain. I've been in a love lust lately and i hate it. Finally, 19 years of my life i have been searching for the the gal that matches my description and i found it. I finally found "her". I was determined to get her fall for me. but that determination was easily destroyed and burn. i've met a few frens since college starts and boy let me tell u. if they are not dickheads, then they are bitches. one of them stab my back to get close to "her". Every single time they hung out, i would rage with fury trying to go balbaric on him but i cant. now while she's keeping an eye out for him. He senses the jealousy and used it to turn "her" against me. Talking crap and bullshit about me behind my back. 1 thing i knew for sure is that the fucking guy definite falls for her like a sad lost little puppy. My anger controlled me doing the things i never thought of doing but soon i woke up and smell reality and realized.... she's not worth it. I've gave up on her...slowly and reluctantly..... but soon i did. On 6/5, i have fully fully fully let go of her. when i am around her, i am my oldself again. but it is HIS turn to feel the jealousy when i am around her being myself. Not to brag but i can be quite the charmer when i am normal again. But the moment i fully let go of her, destiny tried to screw me. It made her do something on me to make me not let go and keep holding on. that's wat fucking pisses me off. I hate the people (especially gals) that are not being sincere. the moment i started to be all gooey for her, the ignorant forgetful and bossy her is back. Fishing me as if i am nothing but a disposable. I sought help on FB and Jac Jac came to my rescue. Reading 3 comments that she commented woken me and gave me massive strength to let go again. I was inspired and determined that this time would be different. it's nearly 8 and i am about to get to class... will blog next time when i am free.

1 word can change everything

2011-01-29T22:40:00.002+08:00

haiz..... i knew when i join elken.... my mom would go total balistic on me..... i tot i was prepared for it... but i wasn't.... everytime talk to her bout it, confidence sure shot down de... sien..... but the thing is... i nid to keep on thinking on my goal and NOT let others influence me... i kept hoping to get a 4-digit payment... to ease my mom's pain... to ease my own pain.... i dun wan to see her stuck in a suffering life... her age by now shud be happy and relaxing... she shud hv enjoy the world, shop till u drop, chat up with frens and just relax.... but heck, she just keep herself busy struggling to find $$ for us.... my brother cant support much bcz he got his own family on the way. my sis, haiz.... low salary dun expect much.... that is why i join elken... i saw the potential.... i saw the BIG picture... if i really struggle hard enough to acomplish that goal.... my mom's struggling and suffering would end. she would finally be happy for once... finally get to see the outside world. but now, all she do say is "dun think too much about it! FOCUS UR STUDY!!! DUN HOPE FOR IT...." all she say is negative words... it hurts... it really does... for a mom not hving confidence in me able to achieve smth..... but who cares... i will still go on.... to struggle... cause my mind has already been prepared to face this things.... i have been warn that the ppl i know will shut me down but is up to me to come out from my box and talk to other ppl in the world.... rite now, i will accept almost everything or everyone to give them a chance in making their own multi-$$$ business~

u're so hot and u're so cold

2011-01-26T00:07:00.002+08:00

ngai ti..... call my mom this evening... ask her about Amway, she replied :things expensive. ask about Elken, she replied: no no no no... things no good.... no no no no...... ur fren punya mother got do b4... earn onli 2k or 3k... for a while onli.... then she no more do liaw... quit liaw... bo do liaw... ==.... ask about HerbaLife, she replied :wat tat? my confidence was shot down.... no doubt ==..... but then again. it went back up but onli half the level. wanna know whY? my mom said, " earn onli 2k or 3k a few months.... after a while no more." to me... earning 2k or 3k by asking ppl to join and i'm onli 19 oledi very good.... so u know wat? i will just go ahead with this Elken... give it a shot... if i fail, fine. bad business investment. if i suceed, in ur faces rite? my fren, baby, is an example. and his mom too. they both lazy dao bao.... (mom is onli sort of) and yet, his mom receive a cheque of rm1k. and it's maybank. dude.... she didnt do anything and her downline help me everything out.... those 2 ppl are consider proof to me already. and another thing is, last sunday i paid rm15 to listen out a talk. there were 4 great ppl (including 1 millionair) in the talk. 1 of it is my upperline or mentor, another one is a person name Liong Kah Cheng. His story is a little similiar to me. His wife is like my mom (a cold fridge). both of them would say, "it wont work or how many u sell today? nth? 1? i told u wont work la". i wanted to talk to him but i didnt hv the chance... dam..... but there is another sort of group meeting tomolo. and i am going and this time i wan to speak to him!

its been long

2011-01-21T02:30:00.003+08:00

wao.... it's been really long since i last posted... and boy am i sure i have miss out a lot... anyway. short summary about the missing pieces. still studying in KLT, failed 1 semester but still able to continue studying (i hope). currently taking special semester. rite now, i am crashing at my fren's crib. his name is baby ==.... we call him tat cause he is used to it. anyhoo, 1 of my reason for sudden come back is this. my fren TMC gave me an idea about "diary". u see, i still miss tat special gal. i might hv liked other gal but then i realise, i could never like another gal unless i move on. that's when it hit me, i am still in love with the gal from the very 1st beginning. anyway, he inspired me to write a "diary" everyday about her. whenever u're thinking about her, miss her, or hv ideas or some sort. write it down in a diary form and give it to her. well tat's what i am going to do. next week i will be going back home for CNY. and hopefully, i can meet the gal. but she is always "busy". i aint sure if she's avoiding me or smth but i hv that feeling that she does. but then again, she send me a text the other day saying, "din forget you la :) impossible de la :) night...". i was complete utter shock and i am embarrass to say, i nearly fell in tears after seeing tat. you have no idea how much it touched me when i saw that text... it was totally out of this world. anyway, it's getting late. panda eyes are coming. i wanna go and hit the hay.

What?

2010-05-05T16:14:00.003+08:00

haiz..... sometimes ppl can be cold and suddenly warm.... i wonder why? i really hv no idea wat is the person trying to say..... yesterday was a shocking nite to me... really freaking shiok dao when i receive a msg..... i wonder wat meaning is tat?

an unforgettable 28/4/10

2010-04-29T10:07:00.002+08:00

as i posted b4.... yesterday was my b'day.... super dam happy and high day..... woots!!! thx to my sibu frens here..... ngu kang chiang, tiong mang chiu, wong sie kuen, baby, tommy, rebecca, joseph, elvin, alvin, siong jie, yang lin..... i oso wanna thx ah jun and cosmas even thou they were not there..... they all surprise me with a cake.... but the surprise is not the cake... is the cream on my face and hair and shirt and body and neck and ear and nose and mouth and eyes and many many many other places.... i love them all!! at 1st, i was attending the SCF de movie nite at LT1.... about 10 sec after the movie played. my phone rang and kang zhen ask me to bring him in because he was "alone".... i stupidly fell for it ==..... i went out and nobody was there.... he keep saying he's at the notice board... so i just walk over and heard his voice.... when i reach there.. it was a little bit weird why he stand outside instead of inside the building.... but tat moment he was looking at his phone so i tot he didnt notice i'm there... i walk towards him and precisely 3 secs later.... a plate full of cream suddenly flash out... but luckily the corner of my eye caught sight of it and i instantly make a run for it.... let me explain..... i was freaking shocked and siak dao when the plate suddenly appear.... scare the crap out of me... so i just make a run for it... but when i was running i baru realise wait a min.... is them!! at that moment i was both deeply touched and freaking scared at the same time... in the end sie kuen caught me and let the face smacking begin... all 12 ppls smack their plates on my face head and body... after all plates are "assemble" on me.... i saw a tiny orange light coming out from the hallway... noticed that my glasses was of cz blinded by the shaving cream so i couldn'nt really see anything much.... then i saw clearly that rebecca was holding a cake coming out while my frens all sing happy birthday song.... the moment was magical and simply magnificient.... i really couln't imagine they would do this favour for me.... after making 3 wishes and blewing out the candle. i ask," who's idea was this?" they all said kang zhen! kang zhen!! he was standing beside me all "clean" and nice and sharp.... instantly i just hug him and just like tat.... he's creamed... and we all start smacking cream here and there..... after creaming session.... i went back to my hostel to take a mop while rebecca went back hers to get her mop and a bucket... we clean up the place a little and then is on to cake!! the cake is SIMPLY DELICIOUS!!!! then i ask some1 out from the movie during SCF just so that i could give that person a slice of cake which i saved up.... that person was so scared i smack the cake on her face so that person kept his/her distance from me... after eating the cake... he/she said thx and went back to her movie... the thing about that is... when she went back in, my frens saw her a little bit giggling and smiling. when he/she sat down, his/her frens non stop asking wat happen? why u go out? wat u do?.... he/she just laugh and smile.... after the movie was over, my frens head back to my hostel to put the stuffs away and then they left. b4 leaving, i said thx to every1 for this amazing,stupendous and memoriable nite... i will definitely never forget this date 28/4/10... i thx every1 for helping me celebrate my 18th birthday!! I LOVE U ALL!!

28/4

2010-04-28T11:21:00.001+08:00

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.................. my b'day today.... wooo...... go facebook and saw 60++ posts on my profile.... wwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeee.............. replied them all hahahaha...... but today i was hoping for smth impossible.... but i guess it's impossible to happen.... haiz....... sad...... but u know wat.... 4get it.... no fish got prawn!!

xD

2010-04-27T13:11:00.001+08:00

yesterday was a happy day for me? lol?!........ i bit blur blur liaw...... dare to dream dudes..... wonder why so happy ho? because..... mou mou dong xi happen!!

Bitter Sweet Day

2010-04-26T11:09:00.003+08:00

haiz......... yesterday (sunday) was a bittersweet day.... why ah? cause..... bitter is i found out smth very very very very horrible and terrible..... sweet is bcz my hostel frens here help me celebrate my birthday (early). we took some photos of cz but my phone cacat de cant take photos..... so nid wait a while b4 my fren will post it. curse my nokia phone.... dam it.... my phone is onli best in dropping without breaking.... xD....... so everytime it drop bo rasa de.... anyhoo.... when i was playing frisbee yesterday... i kena ALUMBA/gangbang by the players due to...... haiz.... some1 big mouth say out 3 days later will be my b'day.... didnt know sibu here ppl oso play this alumba... hahahah... fun and scary... at dinner i ate sugar bun with my hostel buddies. then it's cake session... yum!!! pandan cream yam sponge cake.... superb taste man!!! haiz..... left about 7 days or so for final decision.... if i dun come up with 1 fast... time runs out and i might lose 1 year time..... gg.......... that aint the bitter part.... the most bitter part is about XXXXXXXXXXXXX............. nobody knows yet... wakakakak... except for some gek po gek po ppl..... u know who u r!! post till here for now... .stomach ache... back hostel deal business with stomach a while

Disappointment

2010-04-24T09:40:00.002+08:00

haiz........... 2 days straight of disappointment liaw..... now u maybe wondering how the fug scott can be disappointed? very rare occasion le?.... the truth is ................................. not gonna tell u xD. i just hate myself for not hving the guts to ASK. why ha everytime when it comes to that moment, no dare liao. very very weird de wo..... and another thing i hate is KLT's fugging freaking stupid kanashit line!!!! super duper ultra high lagness wo...... everytime wanna chatting oso very hard... sign in facebook oso mcm 1 hour baru sign in..... sien le.... haiz............. miss home........... miss frens.......... miss erm...... good connection line? ......... miss naruto oso!!!!! dam it!! left a week for final judgement........... gg.com........ now is 50/50 chance.... wtf am i going to do? haiz............................ hope will find an answer soon

Five - keep on movin

2010-04-23T12:00:00.003+08:00

Woke up today with this feeling,
that better things are coming my way.
look at the sunshine screaming and things will be alright in the end,

when the rainy days are dying
gotta keep on keep on trying,
all the bees and birds are flying,
aaahhhh..............

never let go gotta hold on it,
non stop to break a dawn it,
keep movin dun stop rocking

get on up,
when u're down baby,
take a good look around,
i know not's much,
but it's ok.......................
but thins will be allrite in the end.....

above is a song that is always in my head when i woke up witha feeling.... u all shuda listen to that song... very smooth and calming.... woots!! btw, now at KLT's library writting this blog.... aint sure wat to blog but i just feel like to type a lot of words and words and more more words...... weeeeee..... fingers non stop keep tapping those keys on the keyboards is really really fantastic!!

KLT

2010-04-22T10:12:00.002+08:00

it's been a long time since I post a blog.... anyhoo..... make it simple and short... currently studying in Kolej Laila Taib (KLT) since erm april 3rd i think.... aint sure the exact date.... anyway, been studying for about 3 weeks or so... made new frens.... some locals and some hostels..... the locals are very very very nice to me... they all are funny and smart. sometimes we went out to CC and play counter or dota. even better is that we went out to lim teh at nite. Ah Zhen come and pick me sometimes with his ride and we go to this place call Jin Zhu to lim teh.... wanna know why? we went to see la kiang mo!! HAHAHAHA.... no la.... jk u all nia... we went to eat the mee there.... bcz the mee there is very nice. scratch bout local stuffs.... now on to hostel stuffs. about 2 days ago, i just found out freesbie or frisbee or frisbie here at KLT.... the girls bring along their frisbie and we tag along to play.... love that game much!! so now, almost every evening will go and play the game... thru that game, I made some new frens. btw, last nite was christian fellowship nite. I oso mnade some new frens there.... we hv this angel game thingy. anyhoo.... then around 9.30 finish gaming and is back to the hostel to freshen up and ready for bed..... haiz.... today is 22nd april edi.... about 1 week or so left for me to decide whether to go back home to study ME or continue here at KLT on E & E..... in dilemma rite now... cause if i went back home, i will miss dearly all my new frens here.... especially the locals.. all 10 of them T.T..... and will definitely miss the hostel frens too... around 8 or so..... T.T..... rite now I'm in the library writting this blog... it's about time for my next class maths, which i so so so so hate because that's the subject that makes me wanna rethink of going home or stay here. haiz.... anyhoo.... till here for now..... dunno when will be my next post. chao guys and gals.

Save the Greens, Save the Earth

2009-09-14T15:21:00.001+08:00

Brain lagging

2009-07-28T19:12:00.002+08:00

so long no blog liaw.... dunno wat to do or wat to say.... all that i know is tat today Chung Hua announce school close for 1 week because of h1n1.... aduh.... sad le.... but then holiday 1 week happe le..... anyways..... recently I've been playing facebook. FREAKING LOVE IT. Especially RC (restaurant city). Addicted to it..... and dam it.... trial 1 is coming and still play play play..... shit lor.... at least now got a bit of effort in studying bio, doing math question, "learning" add math, polishing up on physic and chemistry and lastly.... cursing freaking teachers that dunno how to teach nor answer any of my question. Haiz....... Stop here now.... wont be blogging for another long long while.....

My head hurts

2009-04-17T11:27:00.003+08:00

Today was kinda thrilling and exciting and scary at the same time. At class, my head got injured by a rusty metal tiang. The window thingy was on top my head and when I got up.... BOOM... GG.com. At 1st I tot I was soi kena hit by tiang. The pain was painful of course but I was oso laughing cause every1 was laughing at me. Then after a while, the pain was still there. It didn't go away like it used to. So, I lift my hand and touch the bump. Guess wat? Blood..... I was so shock but I dun wan make a scene. So I quickly rub off the blood on my school pants. I quickly ask for tissues. But then my fren so gek bo saw the blood and was overly dramatically making a big scene as if I was dieing ==. My frens were all shaken by this accident and force me to go see the principal for the medial thingys. I was fine that time cause when I got my tissue and rub off some blood on my head, it was onli a few drops. So then I recall back wat syptoms would show the head got cut and blood flow and etc etc.... I wasn't feeling anything dizzy, I was calm, my heartbeat rate is normal and most important thing. My blood didnt flow like river from my head to face. I quickly called my mom and ask her to send me to the clinic a.s.a.p. She tot I was in deep shit and was freaking terrified until she finally saw me and the wound. Is like a small puncture skin. At Dr.Chiew, we waited for 1 hour and a half before it was my turn ==. The doctor examined it and nothing serious. Then he inject me with a vascine and then gimme a bottle of red water thingy to wash my head. I was relief to not hear any stitches at all. I was terrified of the pain and the image of having a small bald head. So after the medical thingy, after paying rm 32 for the medical thingy, I went to eat breakfast with my mom. Then go back home lor. Here I am, blogging about this morning. The whole morning time, every1 was in panic and shock and fear and many many many more. Onli me calm calm as if nothing happen. They keep scolding me because it's rusty metal and something about kancing gigi and watever craps la. In the end, onli an injection ==. I was relief and happy and oso scared. So phew...... now off to bed!

I'm Sorry

2009-04-13T20:43:00.001+08:00

woo hoo!! Finally got the photos from the beach party but I will not upload today. Will upload another tim cause now I'm on 2nd com..... the wanna die wanna die de com. I will upload it a.s.a.p. Today, sad day? I tot Bm 3 period would be boring. But something miracle happen. Teacher no come le!!! I was so freaking happy until our form teacher came to our class. She say teacher not in today. I was happy. Then she said teacher wont be in for 2 weeks. I was even happier. Then she said the reason. I totally shut down...... My Bm teacher miscarriage..... I was so freaking shock and felt guilty. Aduh..... why so soi de..... anyways..... erm.... dunno wat to blog liaw. bye bye!!

Beach Party Dudes!!

2009-04-10T18:57:00.002+08:00

Woo!!! The whole canceling about the party thing? Turns out I still go for it. Woo today at Tanjung Beach dam dam dam shuang!!! Aneh very song!! My frens (most of them) were there to make it a blast. Even Yee Wen went! Unbelievable yes? Anyways, we all went go play water and fly kites and make out (wtf?!) and oso eat and drink. I really enjoyed it very very very well. Best part is.... my frens were there to really spice up everything even thou when I dun hv the mood to throw this party. Too bad it rain a little but who cares! That doesn't stop us from playing in the water. I even took some photos from Lih Kiong & Yi Fen de cameras. I will try to upload asap. Man... I miss tanjung and my frens oledi. Thank you all for helping me spice up the party. I love you all very much and I will always cherish and remember this moment for the rest of my life. Thank You All!!!!

Party Pooper

2009-04-08T21:20:00.002+08:00

Haiz..... cancel the whole idea of having a party.... suppose I wan put on friday but then too rushing and I am so not prepared and oso not enuf ppl wanna go..... so I'll just hide away at home.... a cold tall glass of pepsi, some bowls of ice cream, a tin of pringles, some cookies and a dam good movie in the living room, curtains close to darken the room, AC on as long I wished and a warm blanket at my feet with my squirrel beside me. That shud be how my birthday is la..... sound sad but actually quite enjoyable..... oh crap... who the f* I'm bullshitting.... haiz.... of course sad la!!! I was so looking forward for the party but then things just never never never ever go my way at all..... Haiz.... screw this thing. So now wat I wanna do b4 I totally change over is watch the fast the furious 4 and oso hv an apple I-pod (RM 600+). Haiz..... other than those would be a new haircut that is stylish and suits me, a new wardrobe change that would really look as if I'm changed and oso my attitude change. That is wat I want most!! An attitude adjustment. From lazy to hardworking..... from stupid to smart...... from ham zhai to erm... hia gong? -0-..... U get the picture... oh well.... Till then, I repeat. NO MORE PARTY THIS FRIDAY!! DUN CINCAI GO TANJUNG AND SAY IS ME ASK U GO!!! goodnite....

Bring on the party

2009-04-07T19:31:00.002+08:00

Haiz.... dunno wat to do for my birthday and my frens all keep bug me bout it ==. I can't open a party at my house cause mom wont let. So I was thinking of BBQ but then I dunno how to BBQ at all. So in the end I decide to host a beach party. Shud be ok gua..... I've calculated de budget and approximately is around RM200 for the foods onli ==. Oh crap..... I really hate spending money. (I hv my reasons for that) So I guess I have to put on my bullshit face and my bullshitting voice and my very very very best bullshitting techniques to lie my $$$ out of the son of a bitch. Haiz..... I really hate to do this crap but I've no choice. I was thinking of bullshitting RM1000 ==. But that will happen onli when the sky is falling. At most oso he give is rm 300 or less. Haiz.... that shud do la. $$$ is not my biggest problem, but date and number is. I dunno which date I shud held the beach party and oso how many ppl are invited to go. So far is 29 ppl ==. Haiz.... I hv trouble finding a date because some of the 29 ppl are not free and I really du lan if few of my frens showed up. Every1 is important to me and I mean EVERYONE!!! (I'm onli refering to frens) Anyways.... why April? Onli got 1 holiday date which is this coming Friday a.k.a Good Friday. At 1st, I wanna put this friday but some ladies are not available that day. So I need to change it to somewhere between 2nd and 3rd week. Haiz.... btw, today I bought my very 1st contact lens. FREAKING HARD TO USE!!! Damn... I'm such a noob. Well, 1 item down on my list. Few more to go. After completing the list, you all will see me as a new person in a better and more "hardworking" way. Spm is nearing and judgement day too. So I better complete the list fast and finally turn to some1 u all never expect.

Time for change

2009-04-02T14:54:00.002+08:00

I think I've awaken from my long long long long deep sleep........ That day friday, March 27 or 28. I go out lim teh with my old neighbour and my sister. We lim teh at King Wood there. The food was WAO..... cheap too. Anyways, me and my sis drove Victoria (my X-neighbour) back home. We also visit their a home a while because me and my sister drank too much. Anyways, her mom hvnt sleep yet so we chatted a while about academic thingy. Then Victoria's dad came back from his meeting and chatted along with us. He was such an interesting, experience, talented man. I think he is my new idol now. You know why? He told us about his childhood and how he became a Ph.D holder. When he was younger, he always help his family to plant vegies at the garden. Last time they were really poor and live in a hard life. He swored not to ever again come back to that life. So he went for studies and etc. After his form 5, he work at a goverment place for $$$. His frens however are rich ass so they went off for further studies. Victoria's dad counted and plan out his lifespan and said, " I retired at age 55 and now I'm onli 20. I still have 35 years of working and I dun wan to work for 35 years." So he continue his studies at Kuching. That's where he met Vic's mom. Anyways, he continue on and finally he have his Ph.D holder. He came back to Miri and guess wat? Many companies were fighting for him. Back then, Ph.D is like a diamond, rare and valueable. After graduation, he work with Shell. His frens (who studied 1st and graduate 1st) were his boss. After 2 years of service, Vic's dad were his fren's boss. He advice us not to race against time to work. Just keep studying. After finish study, come out to work must have a good attitude. Dun be so grumpy or shy or paiseh. Must be brave and cooperative. With these techniques u will slowly climb the ladder of success. He said many many many many many logical and meaningful tips for life and many other things. I was like so WAO.... speechless..... Then he said," if u still think everything is still very hard and u're lost. Ask urself this question every night, What I have accomplish today? Then ask urself this question every morning, What I wanna accomplish today? Keep asking these 2 question everyday when u wake up and before go to sleep." That 2 question kinda woke me up from my sleep. The whole advice from him I will always remember. Starting tomolo, I will keep asking myself that 2 question. Oh btw, to those whoever wanna become engineers someday. DUN GO TO CURTIN FOR ENGINEERING!! Anyways, I hope this blog will help for those who are lost or troubled with SPM. For more details, contact my hp or msn. Now I will strain every vein, every sweat, every tear in me to study hard for my blardy bachelor degree in engineering and look for a Rm3000-Rm 9000 salary engineering job!

Life sucks

2009-03-27T18:23:00.001+08:00

A new poem gua? I wrote it this morning when I was thinking of my life sucks a lot. Pls keep an OPEN mind.

The darkness is rising and a storm is brewing,
The clouds start to form and rains starts to fall.
I'm standing on the ground looking at the sky,
Letting the rain fall down on my face,
Dripping slowly over my cheeks,
Washing away the tears I've made.
I let out a loud yell to heavens
But I don't hear a sound.
The thunders had drown out my voice.
I felt heavier and sober than ever before.

I lay back on the ground still facing the sky,
Wondering why the world is filled with so many problems?
Everywhere I turn, I saw people suffering.
Fighting with parents to survive, or
Quarreling with teachers to succeed,
Stabbing friends in the back to have glory, or
Betraying each other just to live.
Nobody see the war we face everyday,
Nobody cares who we are today.

Why some parents are such bitches? And
Why some people are such retards?
Is there any fairness in the world?
Is there any justice or peace?

Life is so unfair....
Life is so cruel...
Life is so meaningless...
But with LG...
Life is GOOD.

Lol? Gek dao ma last part?? Actually the real deal is dun have the last 2 sentence. Onli ends at life is so meaningless but I was so upset that time so I try to cheer myself up and it did!! I dun like feeling so depress or sorrow. That's not me. I'm suppose to be hyper and the most funny person. I dun wan to be gloomy or down.....If I did, then the whole class or every1 around me is also gloomy or down. Life still sucks thou.

Not Screwed Man!!!

2009-03-26T18:17:00.002+08:00

Woo Hoo!!! I get back more test papers and so far I onli fail 2 sub!! I was quite pissed bout my English and Est... Est damn hard score A1 and English my class is like haiz..... those who never fail English b4.....Today.....they all fail! I'm not one of them! Thank God. Anyways.... My lowest mark for English in my entire schooling life is about 70 plus gua.... Never and Never less than 70. But this time, that impossible thing..... happened!!! Urgh.... Well.... What ever happens, they happen for a reason rite? I think fate is trying to tell me go for tuition ==. Well anyways.... my physic pass. The onli 2 sub I fail is Addmath & Sejarah. Oh I think Moral will be coming soon... That one oso fail la. So 3 subject fail and guess wat? Suppose this Saturday is the parents & teachers meeting. But luckily they changed it to smth about Agung coming to our school to talk craps and bullshits and etc. So we dun need any meetings. Woo Hoo!! Those who fail bm or 4 subjects are strongly recommended to go for the meeting or Dimerit 30 ==. Luckily I pass BM and fail 3 sub onli!! Woo Hoo.... So I'm not screwed big time!! 1st time, my mom is happy for my BM pass and oso 1st time no nid go school for the meeting craps. I feel so so so so so hai now.... WAHOOO!!!!! HALLALUYAH!!!

Kena tagged....

2009-03-25T15:05:00.004+08:00

1. Name the people you tagged.

nobody ==

2. Describe yourself in one word.

annoying.

3. Who would you pick, someone who really loves you, or the one you love?

the one I love.

4. Have you ever loved someone before but never had the courage to tell him/her?

YES!! (amen to that)

5. How if people reject your confess face to face?

IDK.

6. God is giving u just 5 more minutes before going back to heaven, IF you love someone special, what will you say to that person?

I love you forever and will always be... You're my everything... (Haiya... say so much for wat in the 5 min? Straight away hug her and kiss her for 5 min la)

7. What will u say to a person who doesn’t want to believe u?

You dun believe me?? Ok you..... Dun come crying to me when it happens

8. Was ever a time that you tried to learn to love someone?

Learn love some1?? I tot it's automatic de?? Natural rite?? When you truly love some1, you will know it because there will be angels singing and the lights onli show on her and then flowers everywhere and no matter how much you rub your eyes.... it's not a dream! It's love.

9. Do you have something special with you all the time?

Special ah?? Hmm.... I think got eh?

10. Long distance love ?

No.

11. Best place to cry.

I think anywhere as long you dun banjir the place.

12. Who do you love the most?

Do I really have to say?? I think is...... ME (DUH).

13. Tell us of your dream last night?

I dream of lifegame and erm.... a girl kiss me....

14. Ever hated someone so bad?

You have no idea how much hatred I stored for this man.

15. The biggest & most hurtful lie you heard?

I will give you the money if a few days time.... (he told me that and 6 months later baru give)

16. The last person you had a beer with?

I dunno how drink beer or any other alcohol... they all taste bitter.

17. The last person you went to the movies with?

My buddies.

18.The last person you talked on the cell phone with?

My mom

19. The last person you hugged?

My buddy Kam Chung Lee.

20. The last person you yelled atyen..

Does jio ppl count?? Then it's Teo Yan Tee.

21. In the last week have you kissed someone?

I'm single. You think le??

22. Think of the last time you were angry, why were you angry?

I think is because I cant get the money I need. That time was freaking urgent to pay something.

23. If you could do anything or wish anything, what would it be?

I wish I have unlimited power and $$$ so I can help the world and help myself ^^.

24. If you could have an all expense paid trip, where will you go??

All around the world!! The 1st would be Los Angeles California and 2nd would be LAS VEGAS BABY!!!

25. What you hate the most?

What I hate?? For now I can onli think of 1 person and onli that person.

26. What would be the hardest thing for you to give up on?

Forgiving and forgetting that son of a bitch.

27. Five facts About Me :

Hyperactive, Disgusting, Annoying, Beyond Gross & Talkative.

28. Five things that scare me:

Exam, Red Ants, Bees, My past haunting me & my every actions.

29. Two Songs Playing in My Head Lately:

Taylor Swift - Love Story & The Veronicas - Untouched

30. Five Things I treasure in my life:

My family, My frens, My gifts, My Her (if I have one ==) & Myself gua?

Results of the war...Victory or Failure

2009-03-24T15:15:00.003+08:00

Sry no blog yesterday...... sister use com ==.... Anyways.... yesterday at school, I onli can think of LifeGame. I miss lifegame so so so so so much!! Then my dream was awaken by my classmates. My classmate said," Stop dreaming la. Bm period now ah!! All prepare die la!" I was like.... WTF?!!! BM?? NOW?? Oh F*.... GG.com. 1st day of reopening of school oledi give back Bm test paper. If Bm fail all no mood liaw. No point score on other subjects liaw. Manatau.... I F*KING PASS!!! 1st time of my whole 4 years of study at Dato..... I passed BM!!! It's not any bonus mark or any nyawa-nyawa ikan de marks but is 43!! ( I know it seems very low but hey.... my highest mark of bm so far b4 now is 36 le.) Woo hoo!!! Bm pass!!! So freaking hai man!! I won the most important battle!! Other than that, I oso pass my Biology. Phew.... Oh! Oh! Oh!! My Addmath this time..... is not 1 digit number le!!! Woo Hoo!!! 2 digit number le!!!( 1 *) Usually I get 1 - 9 de marks but this time I myself shock to see 2 digit number!!! Haiz.... I know I know the grades seems suckish to some of ya'll but you hafta understand.... This actually means a lot and kinda makes me feel I got "improve" myself le... I told my mom I pass Bm.... 1st thing she ask is that is it teacher give bonus mark or is it 40 zhun zhun? I told her I got 43 and I oso got 1 section all correct and teacher was disappointed because I'm the onli one who know how answer that section along with 2 more guys. 31 students and onli 3 know how answer that section. I'm one of the 3. Woo Hoo ^^... But even thou I have this "grade", I oso cant take any pride nor be boastful bout it.... The higher u climb, the harder u fall & oso got 1 english literature there "If" de. Something something bout triumph or disaster or smth smth.... Althou, it does feel good to jio some ppl (who jio me b4) on their Bm & Biology. I guess I have the last laugh now but there is still yet to come.... English, Math, Physic, Moral & Sejarah. Too bad I dun have phone now.... If not I can take more pictures at my class and my school and show my "great" result... (I nid to stop bullshitting about myself) Here's a picture of me during Math & Science Club meeting last last friday which a.k.a the final day of war.

( my horn patah from my head... painful... T.T)

Lifegame again!!!

2009-03-22T18:34:00.004+08:00

Aduh today..... NO ELECTRIC IN THE MORNING!! No wonder I sleep so beh song la... blanket cover but no fan blowing me ==. When I woke up, my bed is like a swimming pool. Anyways.... I went to bath. My bath was different today because I no on hot water. I tot I was still at lifegame so I bathed with cold water. Then I realise.... Eh? How come got the red colour de sign on the handle? (blur blur tat time.... half asleep half awake). After my shower, come down had breakfast. As soon I ate the last bite of my mee, the fan suddenly start to vvvvoooommmmmm..... and the tv was like BING BANG KA BOOM!!! Electric was back so I go play computer lor.... Then near tuition time liaw so I off game, get ready, eat a bit then go tuition. B4 I leave the computer room, my phone suddenly ring and my fren told me that today Bm tuition cancel because no eletric. I was jumping around with joy that time. My mom tot I gila liaw ==. But I still go for physic tuition. My physic teacher (Mdm Oooi) currently deliver baby at Sibu and there was a sub replacing her. Omg la.... the sub is very terrible *cough cough*. The notes are still provided by Mdm Oooi but the teacher explain the note is very very haiz...... Hardly know wat the heck he saying at all.... Now I just nid to suffer for 2 months with this teacher until Mdm Oooi comes back (around May). Oh, I was so bored at tuition I drew on the wall beside me. I took a pic of it at my fren's phone. Now waiting for him to send me the pic. Curse me for not having a phone that at least can take picture. I'm thinking LG Cookie or LG Chocolate.... Bah!! I really nid to take some pics nowadays for time is running and I cant call back any memories from the past. Oh well.... pretty much about my day. Oh 1 more thing!! I watch Hitman again last night. I LOVE HITMAN!!! U go bang bang and they go "urgh...." then silence... After finish watching Hitman, I watch Sweeney Todd, The demon barber of fleet street. Damn nice!! (by the way.... 1st time of all my posts I put picture ==. I baru notice got 1 add picture de icon above ==)

LIFEGAME ROCKS!!!

2009-03-21T21:34:00.003+08:00

Sorry for late blogging... was away for life game but no....I'm back from life game 4 hours ago (5.30p.m). Tired but very very very hai now!! I love lifegame!!! So freaking fun and very realistic and very very very meaningful & mostly all bout fun!!! AARRGGHH..... I MISS LIFEGAME OLEDI!!! ==.... Anyways..... 2 things I won't miss about lifegame is that 1) the showering at Petronas Games Village. Wanna know why? U open the tab, guess wat? Water = chocolate. Who dare bath or brush teeth or wash face with chocolate? 2) the sleeping there. The beds were very very ver f**king annoying!!!! When u lie down and trying to adjust a good pose, the beds goes Yiiik....Yiiiiiiiikk.......Yiiiiiiiiiikkkkkkkkkkk...... Alrite. That is onli 1 person doing that. Imagine 12 people in 1 room adjusting their beds at the same time. I guarantee you 100% cant sleep. Too f**king annoying la the sound!!! Well.... aside from those 2, I will miss everything about lifegame. I miss the food (not really), the hostel (not really too), the hall where we played (oh yea! Got AC!!), the atmosphere (hell yeah), the ladies (no nid say de la ^.^), the game (hell hell yeah!!), the teams, volunteers and players, (oh yeah! You all rock!) and watever I can think of but too tired and hai to think anything else now. I MISS LIFEGAME!! (repeat again). I wan go back as soon got another lifegame at Miri here but they wont let me be the player but as the volunteer there. I think oso fun gua.. you get to perform and control the players and erm.... kena rob? Haiz.... I cant really tell u all about lifegame but I can try. (not now) Basically, Lifegame damn damn damn FUN!! Ya'll must try it. It will change ur life!

Breaking Dawn

2009-03-18T09:28:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was Eexin's birthday bash and it was all about fun.... As usual.... They torture me in gay activities such as Issach licking my chest == and me licking his cheeks to the eyebrow ==. Anyways... the party was great, the food was delicious (including Eexin's "banana fritters"), atmosphere was relaxing (except for the smoking part ==) & the people are all "nice" & so was Eexin's dog, Charcoal. The dog keep attacking us male expecially Marvin. Apparantely, we EXCITE him ==. FYI, the dog is a male!!! It kept hugging our leg and move up and down and up and down. The dog is one of us now.... Gay! ==. Anyways, Eexin, Eunice & Kah Yee love to torture me in all sorts of methods. Haiz...... Xi guan jiu hao.... Nalie is the good girl. She didnt torture me. (Thank You Nalie!!! ==). But even thou she didnt torture me, I think I got "accidentally" throw the pillow on her head gua....(sorry!!) The party ended bout... 10p.m. Apparantely since every1 was suddenly bored... they wanted to go Adam's house for movie night. I tot he was joking but in a flash, every1 was in their car and bbbbrrrooooommmm...... The left Eexin, Eunice, Gabriel, Ah Dong and Me behind ==. Well.... the car came around soon after and pick them up and out they went. Me and Gabriel and Eunice went home cause it was late. Such great time. I will remember both Eunice and Eexin's bash as long as I can remember. Oh there is 1 thing still puzzle me until now. It's wat Eexin and Eunice & Kah Yee said. They say something bout me turning Emo and IDK is either Eunice or Kah Yee said I cant turn to emo because I'm too annoying and very hyper but then Eexin suddenly said something bout got 1 person hurt me? Then they were all silent and staring at me for a while b4 continue chowing down the grub. I was blur blur that time so I dunno wat their talking bout. Until now I still cant think wat they meant. Oh well.... Happy Birthday Eexin. Thx for the great time. Enjoyed it very well and well always remeber it.

Keep On Movin

2009-03-17T12:05:00.001+08:00

Pretty much how my morning was.... let me tell ya'll..

Woke up today with this feeling
That better things are coming my way (way)
And if the sunshine has a meaning
Telling me not to let things get in my way

When the rainy days are dying
Gotta keep on, keep on trying
All the bees and birds are flying (ahh ahh ahh)
Never let go, gotta hold on in
Non-stop 'til the break of dawnin
'Keep on movin' don't stop rockin' (ahh ahh ahh)

Get on up when you're down
Baby, take a good look around
I know it's not much, but it's okay
Keep on moving anyway

Feels like I should be screaming
Trying to get it through to my friends
Sometimes it feels that life has no meaning
But I know things will be alright in the end

When the rainy days are dying
Gotta keep on, keep on trying
All the bees and birds are flying (ahh ahh ahh)
Never let go, gotta hold on in
Non-stop 'til the break of dawnin
'Keep on movin' don't stop rockin' (ahh ahh ahh)

Get on up when you're down
Baby, take a good look around
I know it's not much, but it's okay
Keep on moving anyway

Annoying day

2009-03-16T23:00:00.002+08:00

Woke up by a loud noise... it was my phone ringing and the name Eexin calling... I answer the phone and she ask me whethere able to make a cake for her birthday party.... I rush down ask my mom and then her mom talk to my mom and so on..... Then in the end she decide to order 1 cheesecake. My mom went out bought the ingredients and start to bake while I'm at parkson hunting for Eexin & Eunice birthday present. They ask me to buy Cecelia's novel the 3 in 1 type. I got there and search around at least 3 time b4 finally asking the S.A there. I onli came upon the 2 in 1 and other novels. So I called up Gabriel and ask and talk talk talk talk talk.... Finally, I bought 2 books. Then at tuition, I gave Eunice her present. The book named "Thanks for the memories". Apparantely... she OLEDI have that book ==..... So I was quite disapointed.... What's more depressing is that.... The present for Eexin.... SHE OSO HAVE IT!!! ==..... So now me and Gabriel & Allison are screwed...... BIG TIME!! So tomolo I'll just give her gift and hope she spare mercy on me because she ever smsed me saying that "If u bought the book I oledi have, I will punch you. HAHA." So tomolo I nid to wear a thick layer of super glue on my face to let her punch kick or watever.... Haiz.... I heard that she can yi quan gei ni shi. (1 hit ko) Panic here!! Oh well.... Now just wait for tomolo and party party.... ( I have a feeling I will be another victim of gay activity again) Till then.... I wan dota! Night

P/S : Wish that Eexin's mom will get well soon. I feel so sorry and helpless hearing her get cut at the palm.

Party party!!

2009-03-15T22:30:00.003+08:00

So continue on my day.... I was at Bm tuition tat time... when I sms Eunice and Eexin wat to get for their birthday present. Eunice ask for a book and Eexin ask for the same book too ==. I felt awkward because Eexin said "I wan the present that Eunice ask u to buy just now." Then after few mins, Eunice sms me ask that if I'm coming to her house tonite. I was puzzled and then smsed her "tonight ur birthday meh?" Then I thought for a while and oh crap!! I totally forgot today was 15th. She celebrate earlier == & I totally forgot!!! So I quickly rush my tuition and rush back home. Bath and get dressed and off to hunt her house. Her house damn easy to find. Anyways, got there (without present) and wish her a happy birthday. Then sat down by the sofa and watch TV - eat - watch some more TV - chat - take pictures - sing birthday song - clap hand - eat the yummy chocolate cake (from secret recipe) - play truth or dare. That's the interesting part! When I played, I didnt kena at all! (Until the very last min) Anyways, the bottle always pointed Eunice, a guy ( I dunno name ==), Perciallia (dunno spell correct ma. Sry) & Marvin. They consider the soi category. Then there's Joan, Adam, Eexin & me. The lucky ones. The bottle pointed to Joan and she pick dare. Eunice dared her to hug either Marvin or Me for 5 sec. She pick me rather than Marvin due to some reason. But we didnt face to face la. Just my back and her face ==. So I just shut up eye lor and then she hug lor. I can onli feel her cold hands on my arm. 5 sec just swing by really fast and was back to the game. Even thou I didnt kena the truth or dare but I somehow became the victim of a gay activity ==. The bottle pointed to Adam and he was dared to lick MY EAR or NIBBLE MY EAR!! ==.... I will definitely have a night mare after tonight. Adam DID lick my ear == but luckily just a slight touch onli. He also got dared to shake his nose with Marvin ==. Gayish but fun. Adam will be remember as the gay person that night and he will definitely have a more terrible nightmare than me. Another gay activity was the guy (I dunno the name de) was dared to dance the pole dance and Marvin was the pole. So imagine the scene where a guy dancing or spinning around another guy.... *puke* Well then every1 went home and here I am blogging while I'm wiping my ear with many many many soap. Bit tired now and oso hungry.... Now I just wanna go upstairs and bath and try to erase the memory of Adam licking my ear (which has permantely scar me). Goodnight and once again... Happy Birthday Eunice!!

P/S : I will give Eunice a present as soon as possible. Sorry Eunice for not preparing it earlier... I tot it was next sunday ==.

Tired and sleepy....

2009-03-15T12:29:00.002+08:00

Haiz.... Woke up feeling very very very exhausted... dunno where the hell my energy have run of to. Barely able to got up on my feet.... walk to the table (where my phone was charging).... unplug the wire and then I saw the sentence "2 New Messages". I wonder who would sms me so early? Open my inbox as I walked down the stairs. Turn outs both messages came from Eexin. 1st message was sent at 1.42 pm!!! ==... I guess she really is a vampire...(no offence to Eexin). She said that my mom told her to advise me to study ==. Sorry Eexin... Sorry u have to listen to my mother's nagging or watever.... Anyways.... 2nd message was at morning 8.43. I dunno is either she's shouting or scolding or just sleep talking.

"OIEEE! Wht do I hafta bring fr life game?"

I think she is 40% shouting and 60% sleep talking..... Anyways.... to whoever is going to life game this coming thursday at Petronas Game Village, you MUST bring the following items:

1) clothes ==..... (duh! if not naked ah?)
2) toiletries (duh! dun wan bath or brush teeth ka?)
3) junk foods and drinks (in case u dunno how to eat the foods there or u wanna party ^.^)
4) Mosquito repellents (MOST IMPORTANT!! U dun wan the mosquito guo nian rite?)
5) Shoes & slippers & socks (shoes for games, slippers for others)
*6) phone and wallet ( this not really necessarily. But bring at OWN RISK)
7) notebook & pen (keep notes)
8) 3 bottle for water ( there will be singing and I'm sure ur throat will be dry ==)

Well I am lazy to blog liaw... wan go dota ^^. Oh btw, I will update more wat to bring if I remember wat to bring.... well... see whoever u are at life game.

The memories of the past

2009-03-14T18:42:00.003+08:00

Haiz.... today was quite erm... upset & depressing? Morning time, I woke up and on the TV. The video Love Story by Taylor Swift was playing at channel V. While I'm watching the prince and princess thingy, I sort of think... why Miri dun have this such ppl de ha? ( my meaning is like the boy zhui the girl and then got go dancing la or watever la macam the video la) Got is got but very very rare. Haiz.... then I went tuition at 3.00pm - 4.30pm. After 4.30, (the time where it all happens) I follo my fren car to another tuition. Due to road construction, we are force to use the inside pujut road to get to boulevard to avoid traffic jams. While we were driving, somethings caught my attention. The scenery was somehow very very very familiar. Then as we were driving along, more and more things unlock my memory of the past. Guess wat? I was at my old neighbourhood again. I saw the places I used to hang out or eat breakfast. Then I saw my old house again. The feeling was really depressing to see my past gone..... Why cant I relive the way I used to live? Why do I have to suffer like this? Why this happen to me? Why am I the unlucky one?? The whole thing pisses me off and I could onli blame 1 person and onli that person. That fucking son a bitch retarded asshole fucker, jackass bitchy slutty ass!!! I think u all shud by now know who I'm talking bout. Haiz.... if onli he didnt make the fucking choices, I would live my life the way I used to live when I was a child. Haiz.... I guess we can't change the things in the past but to move on forward... Thing is.... I cant move.... I can never ever forgive nor forget the pain he has put on me and my family..... He will pay for wat he done. One way or another..... I will make sure of it.... (if u see me now, I would be holding 2 guns in my hands and pose like the hitman.)

The war has ended!!

2009-03-13T18:52:00.004+08:00

Finally......after long hours of torturing study.....days of sleepless nite.....the sudden increase of caffeine in my body.....the war.........IS OVER!!!!!!! WHOOOO HOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Today we test chemistry and est. I tembak all.... Recently love to tembak many question because I baru watced Hitman that Sunday. Then just fool around in class and apparantely, my fucking bitch moral teacher squeel on me. I got into some troubles but just minor and onli a warning ==. Who cares? Test is over so screw it. The clock was ticking second by second while we anxiously wait for the bell to ring that fucking rock a by baby ringtone and then when the bell rang, the classroom instantly became empty. Too bad that in the afternoon I have to go back school for the math & science club meeting... we have this treasure hunt and I'm the president so I have to be there ==.... Anyhoo.... after the meeting, I walk to the nearest bus station - took the bus - walk some more - reach swimming pool. I swam with my frens and we all have fun splashing water here and there (macam kids in kiddy pool). Then follo my fren ride home and here I am blogging.... Now wanna bath. The chlorine smell is really giving me a headache. See ya round.

Day 6 and 7 of war

2009-03-12T15:28:00.003+08:00

Sorry late blog day 6. My sister was using the computer... Anyways... day six test physic and english (I). So fucking easy man!!! Physic I onli dunno how to do report experiment. I belive is paper 3? Some calculation at subjective I cincai tembak oso can get answer... cool... Then english.... no nid say =). Yesterday after my tuition, Eexin suddenly ask me that if I sell any cakes. I called her up and then chat a while.

"Alo? Vampire ka?"
"wat vampire lor!"
"oh sorry sorry. lord voldemort ka? well anyways..."
"wat voldemort! mm... wat?"
"wat type of cake u wan?"
skip some blah blah blah to the ending
"u talk to my mom"
(hand over the phone to her mom.)
"hello aunty ah? you hold on ah. My mom beside me."
(hand over the phone to my mom.)

ok ok.... then day 6 over.... now day 7. Today test math and moral. Math I really no touch any books or look at any papers. Just see how much I know lor... Apparantely... very little ==. I tembak all the de subjective... objective at least got TRY to do la... then sleep. But my english teacher dun let me sleep ==. She say," if u sleep, I eat ur paper." <--- weird or not? I think teacher on diet gua... Then after recess, moral!!! I seriously seriously tembak all the damn subejective question. (SERIOUSLY!!) I tembak 4 nilai onli which are Nilai Kasih Sayang, Nilai Berdikari, Nilai Kerajinan & Nilai bertanggungjawab. All that 4 nilai is on every fucking question. Then got 2 essay rite? The paper provided, I return it in a "GOOD" condition. (Very beautiful and "CLEAN") Tomolo last day of war. After tomolo, PARTY PARTY PARTY BABY!!! Oh btw, did I mention? I won 1 battle liaw. Bio pass!!! woo hoo!!! Apparantely... I'm the 3rd top among chinese frens whom love to compete a lot (and also top 3 among the rest bumiputra students) in my class. Woo hoo!! Now I have something to jio ppl. ^^

Day 5 of war

2009-03-10T19:04:00.002+08:00

Today test bm... ==.... the paper 1 is 2 essays. 1st essay I have no idea how to do ==.... then the 2nd essay was the sumthing bout negative effect of deforestation. Then after recess is the Bm paper 2. Got the rumusan, bina ayat, tukar ayat and novel thingy. Basically, I tembak all ^^. But wat seems weird is that, I understand everything (besides novel) of the paper. So I know wat to tembak accurately. Oh btw, I slept throu the whole day. So suang man!! Tomolo test physic and now wanna wear my headband and chiong for my physic. (it's the onli subject that make me very hai and sot) Problem is.... I get destracted by the computer (it keep calling me for dota ==) & I cant figure which fucking formula to use on which questions. They all look the same but the answer are totally different!! Haiz...... now brain cramping and eyes burning... so... wish me luck in "studying".

Day 4 of War & Wedding Dinner

2009-03-07T22:22:00.002+08:00

Haiz.... As expected... Sejarah totally blank... The ABC I tembak all and the subjective.... I think they can reuse the paper for other class... Sivik oso tembak all... Now jump to the wedding dinner. I wore a red "happiness chinese wording" shirt with jeans. To top of everything, I also wore a black overcoat. The wedding was John & Nora. My bro is (John' best fren since the age 5) the "hentai". I think is the best man or something.... My sister & my bro's gf is the xiu jie or smth... dunno how say ah.... Anyways, they all went earlier than me and my mom. Lucky that we didn't left early because my sister forgot to bring the flower (tie around the wrist). So I rush up to her room and take the flower and then come back down. After few mins of double checking everything, it's off to the wedding. I walked into the room (Imperial hotel, 5th floor) and handed the flower to my sister. Then I sat down with my mom at a table. Together with us are the old people. I'm the onli teenager @.@ Well.... after that, I got up and look around the place. I saw some familiar faces such as Eexin's parents, Shaleen (my physic tuition girl), Jessica and her mom (my ex-neighbour), Mrs. Raja and etc. So then the wedding started and guess wat? Since my brother is the best of the best fren to John, he gave a speech which apparantely very very very siak soi le ==.... For starters, bai xi jiu (the wedding dinner in chinese de) he mispoken it to bai SHE jiu.... (white colour wine ==). 2nd thing is that, he announce HIMSELF taken ==.... He's out of the market and introduce those single guys de hentai. Despite everything, I still think he did a good job in the speech thing. Well another thing happen during the wedding is that the bride (Nora) & the bridegroom (John) also gave a speech. But John gave more than tat... He also gave a FRENCH KISS to his new wife in front of every1. Sweet? Gross? Romantice? Too over? Idk.... Well... pretty much wat happen at the dinner.... Tired now so wanna go Dota. Peace out.

Day 3 of War

2009-03-06T19:19:00.002+08:00

Today I quite sad and happy at the same time. We have 4 periods which test Add Math. I slept for 3 periods ==. I finish my Add Math test in 1 period!!! ( Dun think I smart finish everything) I skip most of the question except for the graphs. That one I know how to do and that's the onli question I did do..... Haiz... Like I said b4, I oledi "fang qi" add math. Useless piece of crap but important for getting into engineering course ==. Anyways, after recess we have English. I think I wrote the wrong format for the essay. The question was to apply a job as a cashier at the Johor Bahru bookstore. Write a letter and blah blah blah.... Because of the Bm surat rasmi format in my head.... I totally use that format on my essay!!! So basically.....GG!!! Urgh.... wat a day.... Tomolo is a Saturday which a.k.a MY FUCKING SCHOOL REPLACEMENT!!! GND ccb Dato school. Tomolo test Sejarah (100% fail) and Sivik (96% fail too). Haiz.... now I wanna go study. (study the blackjack 21. how to count it) LOL.

2nd day of War

2009-03-05T21:23:00.002+08:00

Today I have been tested on EST & Biology. EST was a bit hard on the essay (because blardy teacher didnt teach us how to write a report) but easy on the subjective. Now, I du lan studying. You know why? Yesterday night and the night before, I studied for Biology. I even put on a head band... Anyways, the test didnt test on the things that I've studied for. CELAKA!!! onli like.... 1/10 of the things I studied come out. But anyhu... I will still past it anyways. My essay question just tembak the best of the best. Tomolo test the fucking add math and oso my fav subject, English (paper I). So now I wanna play game!! see you

P/S : Day 1 of war is onli PJK. Lazy talk bout it.

The War is nearing

2009-03-03T20:41:00.002+08:00

Whooo!! Finally, I passed up the registration form for lifegame to my teacher. Only thing is tat I need to email my photo.... Anyways.... today at school was quite song. (Chat whole day) But tomolo, the WAR will be here!! Every man and woman are preparing their weapons. Guys and gals loading their ammos and preparing their armoury. Some are still slacking at Dota (which will be me). Tomolo... Wednesday.... starts...... OUR FUCKING TEST!!! AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!!!! A bit sohai now..... but at school more and more sohai le.... Me and my frens keep say about our 'war'. How the guys and gals fight just to stay "alive" (our passing mark is 40). I myself know that I will agak agak survived about 6 battles out of 10 battles. I no nid prepare also can survive. (no nid study oso can pass... as long u know our class "body language") That 6 battles would be... English (DUH), Chemistry, Physic, Biology, Math & EST. Bm, Sejarah, Moral & Add Math are the battles that I am prepared to surrender!! Enuf bout the bullshits.... wanna die just think bout it.... I recall yesterday at tuition, Eunice jio me ==. She said my blog is boring.... I admit it too. I dun have a blardy camera so cant take any blardy pictures at all...... Until I can find a phone that I actually like (LG cookie not bad le) then maybe... JUST MAYBE.... I would upload any photos.

Dato School SUCKS!!

2009-03-02T15:27:00.002+08:00

Haiz..... today is such a bore fest. Bm 3 periods make me sleep so song until the (son of a b1atch) teacher keep waking me up ==.... let sleeping dog lie damn it!! (f.y.i I'm not refering me as a dog) Anyways, after bm we have sejarah. I sleep even better cz teacher dun care me much ^^. Then recess.... the Biology. Now that period is when I receive a horrible news. The teachers heard rumours that our fucking bitchy asshole principal wanna cancel our holidays and turn it into test week. WTF??!!! Some might be blur blur on wat I say. Chillax....U see, during June got 2 week school holiday rite?? Fucking principal wanna make it into 1 week onli. He wan us to "study" or a.k.a test time ==..... Then at August got 1 week school break rite?? That week will be our SPM trial or watever fucking test he wanna come up with. Dato school GO AND DIE!!! Furthermore, this wednesday will start our very 1st test. Guess wat? The test papers are not even done yet. Heck, the fullscape paper for the essay writing are not even printed yet. I said it once, I will said it again..... Dato school GO AND DIE!!! Some ppl might think test papers not yet done means test will be postpone and figure why am I so pissy about it. Haiz.... Since this my 1st test for this year and since it's SPM year.... I wanna become very pia in my class liaw. Need start become a nerd ==..... Try aim for number 2 or number 3. (usually is at 18 - 30) This year need TRY and change my habit a bit. Plus I very sien ppl keep jio me now. Really du lan now. So this time test I wanna try pia pia pia pia for 2 or 3 or win my frens enuf liaw. I nid to stop dreaming.... ==

Words got out

2009-02-27T20:03:00.003+08:00

As I predicted, all my blardy frens keep jio me today at school because of yesterday cb Danny read my msg. Haiz...... suffer a lot today..... freaking tired.... Everytime I see my fren for a while or ask question for a while, they will definitely say her name 1st. Btw, today I was supposed to hand it the Life Game registration to my teacher but she didn't come to school!!!! So I've to wait for Monday then I can hand it. Oh did I mention? MY SCHOOL SUCKS!!! Next week is test week and my blardy school hvnt even give out the test schedule. I dunno wtf to revise on. (usually tomolo test wat, I study wat today.) Another thing that I'm pissed is that all my blardy teachers (not including my bio) are useless!!! I ask them thousand times about what chapter will be tested and oso will form 4 chapters be tested too. Until now I hvnt get my answer. CCB GND!!! Some people might get shocked because I suddenly "CARED" for test. Well I've my reason for tat but I lazy to blog bout it.... Onli thing is tat 1) Become engineer. 2)Trying to be the best among my frens (because I very sien everyday kena jio by them. So now is my turn). 3) Ladies. 4) I'm a smart person but just a lazy ass (trying to quit tat habit). But mostly my reason is 3rd one. I dui bu qi her ba if I suck so bad. Besides I promised I will TRY and JY for test. Weird thing is that I dun regret making that promise! Amazing how a girl can change a person life isn't it?? Well anyways.... Now I nid to TRY and STOP Dota, garena, msn, blog, friendster and winamp for like few days until my test is over.

LIFE GAME!!!!

2009-02-26T18:44:00.003+08:00

WAHOO!!!! Finally after long long long long long long waiting..... Life game is back!! Yesterday my fren ask me if I'm going. I was shock to hear bout life game is back. So today at school, 1st thing I do was tha I waited at the Teacher's lounge to meet Mdm Ling Nyuk Moi. As soon I have sight of her, I rush to her and ask bout life game. She gave me the form and ask me to decide soon whether wanna go or not cause the closing date is nearing and the numbers are limited. So after taking the form, I went back to class wondering shud I go or not. I thought of that because problem is that nobody pei me go le ==. Another thing is the price. RM130 le!! So after school, I quickly sms every1 I know who is going. Turns out many of my frens are going so I've decided to go too ^^. Now I'm figuring how to hunt RM 130 now. Haiz.... I guess I can go try become a duck gua ==. NO WAY IN HELL LA!! I'm not that desperate. That's all for today le.... nth much to say liaw. Oh btw, during extra class my fren( cb Danny) wanted to borrow my phone to call his mom or dad. He took my phone and read ALL MY MSG!!! So now he knows who I love. There goes my life again.....

What a Day

2009-02-24T19:45:00.002+08:00

Woke up at 5.30a.m and have all this aches and pains all over me (because of yesterday de PJK de physical test). My stomach there hv this 1 line of pain and my legs are burning. I cant even laugh or lean properly!! Anyways, at school we have 8 periods of studying. I only went for 4 ^^. You wanna know why? Because I was selected to go for this public speaking. (Mdm.Doreen suddenly pull me during the assembly today and ask me to join) So, she said we're onli compete each other and teacher will choose the best to represent S.M.K Dato Permaisuri (the blardy shit worst of the worst OF THE WORST school I am forced to study in) and go for the public speaking competition which will be held on March 12 at S.M.K Merbau. So after recess, I'm supposed to hv chemistry class 2 periods and moral 2 periods ( both I hate because BORING!!) but I went to our school's resource room and then just do my thing la. Apparantely, I'm the onli Form 5 there ==. (because I'm the best speaker among Form 5 students ><) So the teacher gave us a text to read it. She will then jugde us lor. I think 1st round I did quite well but 2nd round I did terribly. The 2nd round teacher gave us 4 mins to think about a topic. The topic was MONEY $$$!! Because of the over excitement and the pressure of 4 mins, I totally blur out and forgot my whole memory of the good and bad of money. The onli think that comes in my minds is that I LOVE $$$!!! Well, after 10 competitors finish their turns, it was like 12.30 liaw le ==. Wanna go home liaw so teacher then say," Alrite guys and gals. Tomolo we'll inform you who's the winner representing Dato Permaisuri." From that on, I kept thinking I wanna go for this public speaking but then in the other hand I am "frighten" of the millions and millions of eyes watching me while they wait for me to pee my pants and cry like baby ==. So in a dilemma here and hope will get my thoughts straight soon. Hope tomolo's fate will run smoothly. Peace out

The Truth

2009-02-22T20:16:00.002+08:00

My mind has stop spinning and my thoughts are done thinking. The pain I'm feeling is now consuming more and more for I still dunno why. The whole thing is really torturing me down to the bones and I cant bare it no longer and really wish it would go away. But after tonight smsing with "her", the pain grows stronger but the wishing grows weaker. From that on, I realise what I want. I now admit that I am in love with a girl. She's the girl that's really make my life worth living for. Day and night I kept thinking of her. Not a day passed me by without saying a Good Morning or a Good Night to "her". I care for her deeply and utterly and F.Y.I, I never done that b4. But a fear of rejection comes to mind. I may have sms her daily and compliment her and etc but to her that's all "frens care". But I do doubt it because I know that no guys ever care for her as much as I do. She might not realise it yet or maybe she does but dare not say it because she might be afrraid I do not think that way and it will ruin our relatioship status. But the thing is, I LOVE HER and I'm not afraid to say it. I'm no longer running from the truth but embrace it. I hope I could be with her but she's afraid of 1 thing. Because of this "SPM", she's frightened to have any relationships. If she have a bf and unluckily the guy broke up with her the day b4 SPM, her emotions might have affect her test and that would really screw up her life. But I'm confident I won't be that type of person. Read the poem below I so far cr8 de. Still editing it thou.

Clouds darkening the sky,
Rains start falling from the sky.
I let out a big sigh,
Hoping for a sunshine.
Just like you smile,
It's no lie.

It's so dreadful feeling this pain,
I can't bare it, make it go away.
I'm bleeding from the inside,
But still smiling from the outside.
No one could see, No one could hear,
The cry of help is left unheard.

I wish I could bring yesterday back around,
So I would be with you here and now.
I wish you could see the way I feel about you,
So you would know how much I love you.

But we are so apart,
And so very different.
It would be a miracle,
With things turn different.

M.E.D.E

2009-02-21T20:20:00.002+08:00

You'll must be wondering wat M.E.D.E is? I tell you. MOST EXPENSIVE DINNER EVER!!! You all sure blur blur de so I'm gonna start from the begining. Saturday morning, wake up at 9.00 a.m. and fast forward to 1.45p.m. I go bath again and get ready for tuition. I wore my best outfit (the red shirt with black collar and Levis jean) and then take out RM150 from my stash and put in wallet. I go down prepare for tuition. Wear my socks and shoes and off to tuition. After physic then BM tuition. My BM tuition is at Re Shen near Fratini the pizza place there. After BM tuition, we 4 frens (me, Yee Wen, Brian & Ming Ming) go to Fratini and eat dinner there. I owe them birthday presents (delayed for about 5 months liaw ==) so today was the day I give them. We got into the restaurant and sat down. The restaurant theme is still Valentine de (i think lazy go remove so let it there ==). Anyways, the waiter took out 4 menu lists and hand it to us. We look through the list and my eyes were as huge as marbles!!! Most of the foods begin in a range about RM16 - rm70. So imagine ur paying everything and they all order exp exp de. Anyhoo... we ordered 2 pizzas. (DAMN FREAKING NICE MAN!!!!) There were Macellaio pizza (RM32) and Hawaiiana pizza (RM27). They order some side dishes too. Ming Ming ordered Cann.Pollofunghi (RM26), Brian ordered Seafood Soup (RM 16) and Yee Wen ordered Spaghetti Bolognese (RM26) which is kids favourite. The drinks were 1 honeydew juice (RM8.50), 1 jasmine tea (rm6.50) and mine is Iced Cappuccino (RM8.50). Yee Wen dun wanna drink anything because all cold cold de. Anyways, we all ate the foods and they were all DELICIOUS!!!! But when the bill comes, the delicious straight away become REGRET LOL!! No la... Kidding la. Bill come I pay all which is RM169.95. (10% service charge which is RM15.45) I was a bit piss bout the service charge price but since the waiters provided excellent services, I cant say anything. My budjet was RM100 and they all say if exceed they pay some. But I dun let them la because frens ma. Plus more it's their "birthday presents". Even thou I am a bit sad to spent RM170 (my most expensive dinner spent) on the dinner but I am glad that I spent it on them because those 3 are consider as my close frens. Even thou it's not like brothers or sisters but there's a feeling of them tat makes me feel comfortable around them. To those who are my "brothers" or "sisters" reading this blog and fill unfair I no chia you. Dun worry, if close frens oledi RM170, imagine ur status. Sure better and higher de. Till now, I wanna go DOTA!! bye bye

Getting worse by the day

2009-02-20T16:52:00.004+08:00

The pain b4 is now getting worse by the day and I dunno why. The more I wan it to go away the more it hurts. But when I reach home and play with my phone with "her", the pain stops instantly. Recently, I've read some notes on the msn. There are some sentence that I am very curious about. (I tend to think a lot.) I'm not sure it's about me (70%) or some1 else (30%). I am wondering am I the cause of her happiness? Is it because I dun let her know who I love and she go crazy thinking bout it? Is she hurt because I like some1 else but it's actually her and she dunno it? I'm so confuse and all this frustration is building up. It's really pissing me off. Sometimes I just wanna call her and straight tell her how I feel. But because of these "afraid" and "rejection" I dare not say anything. I have this situations that really bugs me now.

Situation A)
I tell her how I feel. She might get stunned and answer NO. Then our "friend" status drop greatly.

Situation B)
I tell her a fake name that I like (but it's actually her) and WHO KNOWS. She actually like me but then feel crush and hurt and might keep some distance between us.

Situation C) <--- (this is good situation actually and it's wat I'm hoping for)
Who knows she say yes? Then I will be really FREAKING HAPPY!!!!

Situation D)
I kept silence until she realise it herself that I like her (by that time, I would have work my way to win her heart) but I will suffer the pain everyday until she my gf...

You all might be wondering why I nid to lie her say another name? Because she kept asking me who I like and I cant tell her!!! (yet) Then if I dun tell her, I scare she mad or upset or watever girls will feel. HAIZZZZ..... Like I once said b4, I HATE MY F*CKING LIFE!!! Btw this morning while I was trying to forget the pain, I manage to somehow cr8 another poem but still editing. I will post it soon enuf.

History

2009-02-18T20:13:00.002+08:00

Just back from tuition. At tuition something rare happen. Eexin suddenly pop out from nowhere and ask me to borrow her my phone. My 1st thought was NO but then I saw her face expression (look like very important and urgent) so I reconsider. I was smsing with my fren that time. She was stressing for her Sejarah test tomolo and I was comforting until the devil (Xin) shows up. So I just borrow her anyway. Then she quickly took it and went back to her seat. While my frens were jioing me, I kept thinking wat the heck she wanna do with my phone? Then she return my phone and I quickly replied my fren's msg and put it in my pencil case. While teacher was explaining the chemistry thingy, I highlight some important notes and suddenly my phone rang!! Not vibrate or flashing light ring but REALLY ring!! Luckily for my quick thinking, I quickly press the "silent" button. The ringing stop and no1 was looking at me. Phhheeewww...... I thought teacher would have jio me or smth but she didn't. Now I know why she took my phone. To Xin, thx for the sudden shock. I will repay the favour sooner or later. Anyways, the title "history" has nothing to do with my tuition things. Today at school was usual. Nothing happen at all..... OH WAIT!! Something did happen! 2 students in our school was planning to beat up a teacher because the teacher make them got kick out of school permanently. They cause havoc at school until 2 police car shows up. Every student from the blocks came out of class and watch the "show" but unfortunately some (bitchy) teachers ask us to go back into class and said "nothing to see la. Go back study." WTF??!! Teacher blind ha?? Police oledi come still nothing to see?? Anyways.... the incident occur about 11.30 or more. We heard rumours that the 2 student beat up a teacher or WANT TO beat up a teacher or swear the teacher or etc..... but we didnt see any beating up or anything. But it's wat after the whole thing that really stirs up a pot of interest. I swear that today was the ever worst figthing case in Dato history of my 5 years time here. So geng man!! Even my class teacher stop teaching to watch the "show" LOL. I'm quite lazy now to tell every detail. So until here for today. See ya!

And so the Pain was Felt...

2009-02-17T18:58:00.003+08:00

This secret inside of me is waiting to be burst out from me. It's unbearable and can't be kept for long. In due time it would come out and tell the whole world. I've been keeping it inside for too long and I can't stand it no more. How I wish I have the strength to tell her how I feel but I cant. For it will change many ppl's relationship.(especially that particular girl) Thou my appearance seems unharm nor untouched (as usual) but the excruciating pain is torturing me inside slowly and painfully. Sucking away my energy and life bit by bit leaving behind a huge dark scar unable to be heal nor threated. It felt worse than hell. This is the 1st time I ever felt a pain this painful. Nothing beats this pain....nothing at all.... None of my frens could care enough to see the pain I'm suffering. Probably because I look normal and still laughing out loud but those were the art of fake. I fake a smile everyday to avoid attention and avoid misery for this week at school is Oral week and Minggu Lisan. I nid to let my feelings subside for now so I could focus on my oral. I can't let this pain jeopardize my marks for oral nor my team's mark. Haiz.... can any1 help me? I think not. Onli she can help me but she dunno that I'm having this problem....

Foo Chow Male very kelian! (I am 1 of them)

2009-02-15T20:17:00.003+08:00

Today very bored and very tiring. I dunno why so tired today. It feels like my energy are all consume, drain and sucked out by something. My physic teacher, Mdm Ooi, said that it's weather problem. Different weather can affect your emotion. I dunno it's true or not but who cares. At tuition I ask my teacher about Engineering courses (since Mdm Ooi is kinda an engineer at Shin Yang. So was her husband Mr Yong.) and she explained a few to me. There's onli 3 types that I'm interested in. 1) Civil engineering. 2) Mechanical engineering. 3) petroleum engineering. Oh crap! My head hurts thinking of all these future things..... Anyways, the reason I suddenly ask about engineering things is that when I grow up, I think I'll become an Engineer. (wtf?!! Am I bullshitting myself?!!) The reason I wanna become engineer is beccause ENGINEERS EARN BIG $$$!!!! RM3000 - RM 13000 per month! Imagine urself holding that much money and you onli spend about rm 2000 per month. Anyways.... the whole thing was actually inspired by my fren *** ** ***.She said that when I grow up if I wanna get married to a Foo Chow girl, better prepare lots of $$$ because Foo Chow girls are DAMN EXPENSIVE!!! (because of the stupid tradition) I myself is oso a Foo Chow person so I know all the pantang and tradition. Apprantely when u wanna marry a Foo Chow girl, the ang pau money for the girl's mother is roughly Rm 8000 - RM 12000!!! That's onli ang pau money! We still have the wedding, the room, the house, the foods, the new furnitures, the rings, the pair of bracelet, the wedding gown and tuxedo and etc etc etc etc..... And worst thing is that... EVERYTHING ALL MALE PAY!!!! So for Foo Chow guys, get ready to go bankrupt!!! well.... I'm still tired from today. So I go take a shower and then on the AC and then relax at my bed with a good book beside me and my phone too. See you all later!

Valentine's Day.

2009-02-14T21:25:00.002+08:00

Haiz.... today is valentine day. As usual.... alone.... Lonely Valentine Day. Oh well... still young! who cares?! Few of my frens received some gifts but most of my frens received a kiss...LOL!! (still in the "rhyming" zone mood). Anyways.... somehow I dun really feel lonely this year because there is some person pei wo du guo qing ren jie. (if chinese ping ying wrong, dun blame me. I noob) Well.... I lost a bet to my fren, Su Tin (long story lazy to write). I owe her a secret about the person I'm crushing on but I cant tell her yet. It's too early for me to say. It might ruin some relationships. Anyways, this morning my uncle came. He drove from bintulu to come to miri to see her wife. It just so happen that her wife house is somewhere near my house. So he came along to my house with his son and wife and the wife's mom. They chat a little and then when off...... boring? I know.... Nth else to blog my day. Just dat I think I love her. (her is someone I like....duh!!== But I cant tell yet. ) So erm.... pretty much bout my day today is that I'm single (as usual), bored and lonely but at least a girl same with me like tat and erm oh ya!! HAPPY VALENTINE YA'LL!!! For those love birds, give ur loved ones A BIG KISS!! ==

My first ever Poem...

2009-02-12T16:14:00.005+08:00

School was so F*CKING BORING!! 2 math period, 2 english period then recess then 1 addmath period AND 3 DAMN BM PERIOD!! It's like 50 years = 1 sec!! so I try to sleep but just cant. Teacher kept waking me up ==. I try to read newspaper (we got bring newspaper today for our Sivik thingy) but teacher kept scolding me. So I try to doze off and then suddenly a thought came to me. I took out a piece of paper and start recalling back the lyric I read last night. I simply wrote here and there and then WAAALLAAHH!! a MASTERPIECE!! (note that this whole poem doesnt have any words that belong to the lyric I recall.)

You're so beautiful,
You're one of a kind,
You're so special,
You're so hard to find,
You don't know it yourself,
But I know it myself.

You have such beautiful eyes along with that curly long hair,
It's like a magical scene which only a few can share.
You're so amazing,

It makes my heart sing.
Your sweet gentle soul is so very pure,
It makes me feel warm and many more,
Your lovable person is very adore,
Being with you was never a bored.

You think you're rough but I think you're not,
You think you're ugly but I think you pretty,
You think you're lonely but I think you're lovely,
You think you're nothing but I think you're something.

You're such a smart and funny person,
And yet you denied you're that person.
You've always dislike the way you are,
But I like you for who you are.

Copyright of Scott Ting's product (every tissue will now have this poem ==)

This poem is ME that thought of it and ME the one who cr8 it. 1st time ever I cr8 this such things and it rhymes too!(maybe I should be in the poetry business @.@) Anyways, I hope whoever read this will understand what is it. I heard some ppl say it's very deep and touching. I tot it was just a poem describing a love one. But I still cant quite get a feeling that I'm missing something and the poem also a bit cacat... got few parts in arrangements. I will edit my post sooner or later. Depends how my emotions bottled up. For now just enjoy and see ya.

Oh shit!! I dunno wat is wat!!

2009-02-10T20:21:00.000+08:00

U guys and gals might be wondering wtf I'm thinking.... well.... I aint so sure myself.... but before that. Rewind back to yesterday afternoon after school at home. I HAVE SUCCESSFULLY cr8 my experiment for my club thingy ^^. It's "Solid Water". Ever heard of tat? No rite? So happy I get to smash the water without even dropping a single drop anywhere unless my hand itchy go pour it. Usually when u hit the water, the water splashes rite? My water actually HARDENS!!@.@ Well.... it's about physic. Visconcity if not mistaken.... BORING!! now fast forward back to now. I dunno wat the hell I am feeling now. I'm not sure whether I am fighting the truth or running from it. Then ironically, the song Crush by David Archuleta suddenly played in my Winamp = =. I dunno whether it's fate giving me a sign or just a coincidence. Not onli that song oh! Your Call by SecondHand Serenade after finish Crush. The chorus "Cause I was born to tell you I love you and I'm torn to do what I have to, to make you mine. Stay with me tonight", really surprised me you know?!!( I finish downloading the song so I never heard it b4. I hear my frens say it's nice so I eat bao nth to do go download songs) I think I am running from the truth and oso afraid to admit it but somehow I am still able to deny it..... haiz.... any1 save me pls?? oh by the way, soi ah me today. I chatting with Kah Yee. Ask a few personal questions about some1. who knows that SOME1 is sitting beside her reading everything I wrote ==..... Guarantee tomolo at tuition, Kah Yee and Eunice sure torture me like hell......oh wait... WORST than hell......... GG.COM!!!

Sick Season?!! who invited them?!!

2009-02-08T12:33:00.000+08:00

Sorry for long time no blog ya'll. This 1st week of school, I found out that many ppl got sick. My frens (half of them) are sick. Coughing all the time, sneezing most of the time and blowing their nose everytime!! Lucky for me, I didnt get sick!! *yet*...... Well.... one of my most dearest fren got sick and that's really putting me in a condition that really really really is scary and worry to sick. Haiz.... now my fren is stable so far..... just hope he/she heals faster and get well soon and I mean REALLY soon!! Just hope he/she doesn't get anymore sick.... That day was so freaking afraid and worried...( 1st time this "care") all of u dun think too much ah. Caring comes naturally within us.

The past is the Past

2009-02-02T13:52:00.000+08:00

Haiz.... me again..... I guess we we're never meant to be.... I saw her blog saying a S guy but dunno who that S is..... I guess she made up her mind.... Freedom is more important for her. Then I've made my decision and finalized it. I think that she be better off without me in her life but as a fren and nothing more. Then I guess this is goodbye to hope and hello to past. I felt like I'm a burden in her life. If she had a bf, it might effect her on her studies for law. Besides, I'm just a past and people say the past remains as the past. So game over. I'm done......goodbye for now and let fate take us where we might meet again....Oh and one more thing. People say 1 door closes and another open. For me 2 doors open up widely and with a "welcome'' mat but I dunno shud I go to the doors?? Sometimes I really hate my emotions taking control of me and my brain for thinking too much.

chu 6

2009-02-01T11:18:00.000+08:00

I know today is Sunday but I was suppose to blog yesterday but my sister was using the com ==. Anyways, Saturday morning after I had breakfast with mom, I went to parkson to meet up with ScottAmelia and Su Tin and Jing Wen (he came late at 2pm). So erm... we just walk around parkson and I saw many familiar faces. One of them is Chung Lee de GF. I also saw Eexin and Joan (again), Ming Ming, Mei Ting, Desmond and etc and etc..... Around 2.30, Su Tin's bro is here and we all get in the car and drove to her house. (it's at Taman Tunku...far rite?) B4 going to her house, we stop by at Bumico where ScottAmelia live. Her house was nice and cosy. Big blue roof top and wide range of area. Anyways, we stopped by there so Su Ting de bro can take smth from his fren. BTW, Su Tin de bro is quite cool and nice. He likes to joke around with ppl. He came up with the name ScottAmelia. After a few mins drive, we finally made it to Su Ting house. It was huge and freaking nice!!( me sakai ok?) We sat down and eat and drink. Then we went upstairs to the 2nd bro room and play computer a while. Then came night. We went back downstairs and meet a few ppl including 2 YB and 2 Japanese people. By the way, Su Tin's dad looks like the KFC person but onli short hair version. Anyways, we shaked hand and chat a bit and Su Tin open up a movie for us to see. (meet the Zohan ==) At her house also got a clown.... Now there's a shock. We then eat dinner and after our dinner, we went to the dinning room and sat down at the round table and played a few games. We played Cho Dai Di & MAFIA (best game ever). The MAFIA game was really really spine chilling and interesting game to play. We even invited the 2 Japanese fellow to play. They enjoyed it quite well. It was late and me and Jing Wen gtg. We follow one of Su Tin's fren car home (Jia Yang). Turns out he's my brother's ex colleague at Petra Resources. B4 we left, we took some pics with the 2 Japanese fellow to remember the moment. We all have a great time there. THX Su Tin for inviting us and having a great time with us.

boring chu 4

2009-01-29T20:48:00.000+08:00

so boring ah today!!! Onli my uncle come my house and I go to my neighbour house for dinner. My bro's gf is back and I FREAKING BORED!! Now helping my mom to make cake (my stock habis liaw) for tomolo and saturday de ppl. One whole gang of ppl will come my house. I'm still waiting for Gabriel and Xin they all come.... I hvnt repay Xin's koko krunch. LOL...... Well.... boring oh chu 4. Nothing exciting happen at all....

Chu 3 at Xin house

2009-01-28T15:30:00.000+08:00

Early morning oledi prepared for Xin's open house. I reach there bout 10.40 A.M. Then I go in and greet and etc and then 1st thing I do is go get spaghetti!! YUMMY LA!!! ( I wan da bao de but they dun let) Anyways.... after finish my breakfast, my hand start to itch. So is everyone elses. Xin's uncle even told us, " Must lose all ur money here ah. Then you can leave. Ha Ha." We went upstairs and GAMBLE ALL DAY LONG!! We played blackjack (21) and "In Between". I lost most money on the "In Between" game. I onli bet Rm1 and still can lose many many $$ (dun wan say out number. Too painful to say) Well.... I get to meet some of Xin's frens & family. One of them is her cousin, Izaach. He's a really great guy and fun to hang out with. (dress as a bartender, casino dealer, waiter, balet & himself) Me and him even finish Xin's breakfast cereal.....KOKO KRUNCH!! (sry xin. I buy u new one). Another fren is Grace (the girl who make me soi and lose most of my money and she took them all!!!) well.... Now I tired bit and sad for my money gone. I think now I go relax.... See you all next blog. HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!!!

Happy Chinese New Year (chu 2)

2009-01-27T21:50:00.000+08:00

Today wake up early oledi heavy rain...... then I go back sleep. After 1 hour wake up again and then go bath and get ready. I went to my old neighbour house. (currently moved to somewhere at airport there. xiang xiang garden i think...) Her house damn big!! So freaking nice and very very very very stylish. I love their food most LOL!! Oh crap.... now thunder storm. I'll continue later. anyways... continue where I left off. After her open house, I come home and rest bit. Then my fren Amelia N Su Tin come to my house. They stayed bout 3 hours gua..... we took some pics and then night time my bro de fren come. That all bout chu 2. Now I wan write chu 3 de

A new member to the family

2009-01-24T23:11:00.000+08:00

OOO!!! Finish adjusting, configurating, assembling feng shui and installing my new computer!!(damn tired). I even bought the new woofer and speaker for it. (Altec Lansing!!) sweet man!! anyways... I've tried out the new com and I' m very satisfied with it accept for a few things. I dislike the winamp skins.(onli 4) I' m still hunting for it. I played my music and guess wat? The speaker and woofer rock the house!! 2nd, I hate my new MSN. The new MSN changed liaw. Everything all different le.... so ugly again.... haiz.... well... that's the things so far for now. I've finish uploading dota, garena, my file, winamp, windows media, real time player, AVG, limewire and flashget. So far I enjoy most about my new com is my dota gaming experience. SUPERB MAN!!! no lag no jam no delay!! all smooth like baby's skin. PPL all gangbang ulti I also not afraid. WOOOT!!! anyways.... now I'm still trying out my new speakers and woofer. I wonder how far I can push it......

There's a bitch living in my home

2009-01-24T12:50:00.000+08:00

Last night finish assembling my new computer. (sweat a lot damn it) Then this morning I double check everything and then I found out that the computer doesnt have the windows XP system yet. So my bro ask his sister (a.k.a my sister but I nvr admit it) to ask the fren come and install the system to our CPU. So this morning I ask the person (my sister, again I nvr admit) to hurry up ask the fren over and fix everything. I want the computer fully functional by this evening so that I can go out with my bro to buy a new speaker for my new computer. (altech lansing!! <--- damn awesome but damn expensive!!) anyways.... after telling her that, she screwed me say wat as if I'm the boss la and order her do this do that. WTF??!! I onli ask to hurry up everything so that tomolo can focus on the new year things. Then she keep say "is the way u say that piss me off." WTF?!! I no jio her she jio me again. Go die la u mother fucking bitch asshole shit face HORE!! (note that the word HORE is true. You have no idea how many guy she simply date) Ccb.... everything all she want de and ask me to do everything. CCB. I oledi "Hao Xing" help her do everything. Install the computer, arrange the place, plug the wires and etc and wtf I get in return? A blardy ccb jio here and there. WTF?! CCB. Sienz this bitch. To those guys that knoe her. Open your eyes la!! She pretty meh?? I think my neighbour dog more pretty than her.

I'm Strong enough to resist my feelings

2009-01-23T19:15:00.000+08:00

Back from my date. I went with Jing Wen, Amelia & Su Ting. Apparantely I found out that Amelia went out is because Su Tin got ask her out. So she also just find me also la..... (sad hearing that) Anyways, I was strong enough to not let my emotions take over me!! I didnt do anything stupid or anything that look like I "zhui" her. THX GOD!! It's just out go buy my CNY clothes and then eat then go home. So happy nothing stupid or interesting happen. Just normal day out with my good frens and enjoy the time we have. As time and age grows, we wont be having many dates like this one. Oh, I mention earlier in my blog that "something was bugging me"? I think I know what is it liaw... Smth about my tuition...(to those that know what I'm saying....SHUT UP!!)

I've finally get to meet her!!

2009-01-22T18:59:00.000+08:00

SHE SAID YES!!! She'd finally manage to pitch in a little bit of time to go out with me and my fren. So now, hope I dun screw up tomolo's date. Thinking wat I shud wear..... and how much I shud bring.... (how I wish I have credit card now) Cant wait for tomolo!!! So happy! get to meet her and my long lost fren also Su Ting a.k.a Chobits_cyhi. (met her at bouleavard around november 2008 ==)

Long patience has been paid...

2009-01-22T13:53:00.000+08:00

WOOOO!!!!! She's back!!! She's finally back!! After long unbareable pain of waiting, she finally returned from KL and now is Miri. Now I'm just wondering... CAN SHE GO OUT WITH ME OR NOT!!!! (really looking forward for that) I've definitely planned out how my day goes... but somehow, there's something bugging me. I cant quite figure wat is it. Anyways, tomolo friday I get to SKIP school. WOOOOHOOOO!!!! Eat SHIT BLARDY SMKDP!!!( no offence to any1)

Stress of life

2009-01-20T20:53:00.000+08:00

Haizzz..... today was a freaking freaking damn freaking stress day. I kept thinking about when she come back to Miri so we could go out on Friday. I smsed her a lot of times but she herself dunno she coming back on Wednesday or not. She misses Miri a lot and I wanted to be the 1st guy who took her out and enjoy back the Miri life. I had planned out the whole day activities for more than a month now. I've been patiently waiting for so long but then as usual.... nothing ever goes my way. Her parents are still considering whether to take her to her hometown. If they do that, then I wont be able to go out on a date.... and also no chance to buy my CNY clothes!! == I delayed my shopping time so that I can ask her fashion advice on what I shud buy and what not. I was planning that on Friday afternoon, we could catch a movie and then go shopping at the new Parkson. After shopping we could go for a nice romant*c dinner at HotSpot. After the lovely dinner we could go to Desserts for desserts. But all those plan are about to be flushed if she no come back early or no come back at all!! So now I'm really down in the dumps, waiting for her return.... it's been so long since we met again. I'm really looking forward to meet her again but as I said nothing goes my way. Haiz.... ANY1 CAN HELP ME PLS!!!! S.O.S!!!

Why?? Why??

2009-01-19T20:40:00.000+08:00

Today was quite normal day for me until at night. At tuition..... the three little devilish girl somehow manage to humiliate me in public. (really want say the name but I cant. later I die....) I was just smsing as usual cause I'm bored and also wanna jio Ee*i*. Then I remembered her blog about the frog thingy... so I gek them say when the frog funeral. I wanna pay my respect too. Somehow that can turn me into Bian Tai...==..... K*h *ee really like saying that word OUT LOUD!! keep repeating again and again and again.... luckily for me, not much people know me in the tuition. Oh by the way, ever believe in Karma? That's what happen to the 3 devils. ^^ The teacher humiliated them extremely worst than mine.... ("can you 3 jing? (quiet) got take moral subject ma?") well.... it's actually kinda harsh but hey... life's unfair. Moral value of the event happen is that ermm....... When you do good things, good things happen to you. When you do bad things, it will come back to haunt you!

Could it be a sign or just a compliment

2009-01-17T19:26:00.000+08:00

Sry all for late blogging. Busy busy busy lately.... (doing EST Presentation). Anyways... yesterday 16/1/2009, 8.29 p.m. I was quite freaking happy!!! wanna know why? Some1 very special to me gave me the most shocking compliment that I never ever expected. She repeated 4 time that word!! (along with other compliment that really makes me WAO!!). For guys out there, u knoe the feeling la when a girl give u a compliment that u never expect. But usually all good things must end..... now I'm really in deep sh*t trouble. Emotion taking control of me! Dunno whether is a sign for smth or just a normal compliment. Haiiizzz........ As I said b4, I will follow the Pirate Of The Carribean style if IT doesnt succeed.

The decision is made!! (mostly)

2009-01-09T16:11:00.000+08:00

I have think this through and heard a lot of advice from frens. After long days of non-stop thinking, I've finall made my decision. I will do "IT". (not allow to say until the "thing" is done...sry all ==). If I fail this task, I think I will follow the movie Pirate Of The Carribean. I will cut out my heart and lock it up in a chest. Hide the key and bury the chest somewhere far far far away..... and forever cursed!!! (drama a bit because this "IT" is really a big big deal for me). I aint sure about my thoughts but any1 wanna gimme advice I will listen. Really really freaking scary situation for me now. If "IT" is a success, I scare I repeat my mistakes again. If "IT" is a failure, I will totally be down in the dumps. If I no do anything on "IT", forever that whole opportunity is gone and never back. HELP ME PLS!!! S.O.S!! S.O.S!!

It's a small world

2009-01-06T15:39:00.000+08:00

Today was my second day of schooling.... nothing much happen accept I've let out my dark secrets to my fren. Anyways.... wat I really wanna say was yesteday's event. 5/1/2009, the 1st day of schooling. I got up at 5.30 (so freaking early!!) and really really really was freaking tired. Get prepare for school and it's off to school. I went to my class and guess wat? The school (I think kena 4D or TOTO) replace all the crappy lousy tables with NEW ONES!! The pathway was re-cement, the walls was fresh painted and best of all, the textbooks are new too!! I was so happy for the books cause now I get to "conteng" it. Muahahahaa!!! anyways... after school, I rest for the afternoon and get ready for tuition which starts at 5pm - 8pm. I ate fried rice and then rush to tuition to beat traffic. I paid my fees and enter the classroom. (onli 8 ppl in my add math class ==) After 1hr and 30min of painful mind torturing add math, it's off to chemistry where all the past returns. I sat down with my fren and guess who walk into the room? It was Eexin, Adeline Lai, Yong & Syn Yee. What a freaking small tiny little world this is. And so the lesson started and every1 was quite as mices accept for Yong. After tuition, I went home wanted to use the computer but then I remember it was Monday, TV was showing "Monday Night Laughs". I sat down and watch TV until it was 11pm and off to bed for today. That's all the things that I've faced for 2 days. I wonder wat else is in stored for me?

Things pop up when you least expect it

2009-01-04T13:50:00.000+08:00

I've got up at 8.45 today (blardy damn early) and then quickly shower and get dress. I got into the car and drove off to SCHOOL for registration thingy. I've seen my frens again and yet I'm not happy nor excited (weird but true). So I go to my class 5S2 and then I saw a malay woman sitting there. Turns out that that malay person is my FORM TEACHER!!! (also my math teacher) Haiz...... I sat down the chair and waited for my turn. Finally after 3 whole long slow mins, it was my turn. I got up and go to the front and pay my bills. Guess wat? It was the cheapest bill I ever paid (RM 1.50). So I gone through the school recalling back the memories but the flashback was interrupted by my phone. Turns out my fren from KL sms to wish me luck for Form 5. It's been really long since I've saw her but luckily she's returing at around January before CNY. I invited her to my house warming and also ask her out on a date (not a date date but just a date). Then I went back home and start doing cookies (mom asked me to do it). I'm selling it for CNY and oso to eat it ^^. Now I my mind is kinda clouded with deep dark storm. I've to decide shud I buy a new computer, worried about my tuition situation and also "smth smth". Hope I can finish solving everything b4 CNY. Party at my house on CNY and I so do not wanna get stress!

Storms clouded my mind

2009-01-03T20:57:00.000+08:00

Haiz.... Saturday.... I woke up around 10.30am. Drag my body downstair and lay on the couch watching Batman. Then I on my computer and start playing Dota until noon. Then sumthing come across my mind. "Is my tuition starting today or tomolo or next week??" As time goes by, I'm still playing dota game winning and losing. Whenever I was losing is mostly because I keep thinking to myself, "when the blardy hell tuition starts? They should have contacted me days ago to tell me when tuiton starts. Oh crap! My hero died.....AGAIN!!" Then it was about 4pm, I off the computer and still thinking about the tuition situation. I called all my tuition frens but none of them knows when it opens. So I just sit back relax and enjoy my last free Saturday b4 school reopen (why?! why does the school have to reopen!!!) Nothing to watch on the television so I started to work out a bit and then off to showering. After shower, my mom took me out for dinner and go get some groceries at Ng Siang Hap. I met my fren there and we chat a bit then we left the place. I come home changed and then here I am blogging about my day. (seems kinda boring ==)

And so the hair was cut

2009-01-02T12:35:00.001+08:00

Haiz.... this morning very suck!! I was planning to sleep till afternoon 12pm or 1pm but my mom just have to wake me up at 10.00am to got get my hair cut. I was so freaking tired and sleepy but she kept blabbering and yelling and u know how morning is. The whole noise very irritates me!! So i quickly got up drag my half dead body to the bathroom and slam the door. Turn the nozzle and hot water came pouring down. I actually slept DURING showering!! (I nvr know I hv that abilitly) Then after I wipe clean my body and get dress, I look in the mirror and say to myself, "gudbye hair. I will miss you ==" so I got down into the car and drove off to Toni and Guy the hair saloon. I just sat there with my eyes close wishing everything would just hurried up so I wont bare anymore pains. My barber knew me so she keep on chatting and chatting and chatting on and on and on bout SPM. "You form 5 liaw wo! Dun play so much game. study study study!! blah blah blah blah..." I was very annoyed by this conversation. I really HATE ppl keep lecturing me stuffs like that. As if i dunno wat to do and wats important. (50% i dun ==) After 20 mins sittin there at the chair, it was done. My hair got shorter and more "school approval". WHY??!! WHY DO I HAVE TO CUT IT!!!! so I quickly got out and into the car and drive to the nearest cafe to eat breakfast. The worst is onli beginning and it will be a long way before it's over!! oh crap.... wish me luck getting thru all this.

2009 is no difference compare to 2008

2009-01-01T21:14:00.001+08:00

My life still suck a lot.... the 1st day of 2009 i tot i would be out hanging but instead I am still at home.... fading slowly. At least I spent the morning and afternoon in my Dota gaming. I oso get to enjoy dinner and a jug of my most favourite drink...PEPSI!! My brother's gf and the sister came by and we all were very jolly and happy. I tot everything was going well until my sister == have to brought up a conversation (that I've always hated). She wanted to buy a new computer because she says it's too slow and blah blah blah. It's slow to her because she simply just download everything at once and click many websites and open so many damn useless folders. As if she is such a "busy" person. By doing all this, the computer sure will get Lag and very very very delay. She blame everything on me because I everday Dota. WTF??!! My gaming is onli Garena. That so do not make any lags at all because it's just one programme. What bout her?! She open tons and tons of programme. Windows here and there pop up non stop popping. I dunno why but we just never connect at all and I am seriously thinking that she's is the adopted one. Anyways.... I dun wanna buy another computer because I dun wanna spend money on something I dun need!! My computer is still fine for my way of using it. I take things slow, 1 step at a time. I dun keep spamming the "search" button for searching sumthing and I dun open Winamp and Windows Media Player at the same time!!! My way of thinking is that to keep my savings for the future uses instead of spending it on sumthing which I am not urgently need now. That's why 2009 is no difference compare to 2008. I still fight and argue with my sister, my mom always sienz us fighting, my bro's gf and her sister are always victim and my life still sucks. haiz.... any1 can save me?? I'll reward you a dinner!! (real no fake)

2009 is no change compare to 2008

2009-01-01T21:14:00.000+08:00

my life still suck a lot.... the 1st day of 2009 i tot i would be out hanging but instead at home.... fading slowly.

life is so unfair

2008-12-31T15:46:00.001+08:00

I'm new noobie to this blog

2008-12-22T22:38:00.000+08:00

Hey there everyone! I'm Scott Ting and I'm 16. I'm start blogging because of influence of my fren. well... I'm still not sure how this blog things but all that i know i love to talk & chat and write stuffs. So I guess I will be spending quite a lot of online time here blogging. Probably writing about my everday lives and wat I go through, accident events or happy events. What ever life brings to me and I've the time to write it, I would. So.... that's pretty much wat I can think of for my 1st time blogging. thx for taking ur time to see this. Once again I am Scott Ting